65. "Don't blame the other person for how you feel."

We encourage you to epress yourself -- and to take responsibility for your feelings; don't blame the other person for how you feel. Note the difference in the ... example between "I'm upset" and "You're an S.O.B." It is not necessary to put the other person down ... in order to express your feelings.... Use "I-messages" to express your own feelings, rather than passing responsibility for how you feel to someone else. Your feelings are yours."

From "Your Perfect Right" by Robert Alberti, Ph.D., and Michael Emmons, Ph.D., published by Impact Publishers.